Impossibly Possible Algebra Question!

There is a planet which is X kilo-squiggles in diameter. The planet is an exact sphere, apart from the little alien in a car right smack on the planet's NORTH POLE. The planet has a north and a south and a east and a west all in the same place as Earth. The alien, called Barf, wants to take a little ride around the planet, so he takes his car and rides south for Y kilo-squiggles, checking his compass every milli-squiggle and re-calculates his direction, then goes Z kilo-squiggles east, again checking his compass every milli-squiggle. Finally, he goes north Y kilo-squiggles again, and lands back in the north pole.

Question Level 1: What is the circumference of the planet, given that pi is equal to 3.14159265358979323846264338327950288419716939937510582097494459230781640628620899862803482534211706798214808651328230664?

Question Level 2: If his car can go A squiggles an hour, and there are B hours a day, how many days does it take to finish his journey?

Question level 3: Is this question even possible? (Hint: draw a map. )

All About Algebra.

Firstly...we are NOT talking about bra. We are talking about representation in another form... a way to express things in a simpler way.

For example: Let's write down infinity! YAY!( the pupils say )
Then they start writing. And find a c***ful of problems.

1. Oh my GOD! What the HELL is ALGEBRA?!!?!?!
2. Hmmm... teacher, can we write it like this? ( and then shows off a nice cute picture of fluffy bunnies )
3. Can we just write down the word?
4. Can I go to the toilet? I wanna poopoo.

When suddenly... a boy jumps out from the outside of the classroom through the window, and says:

" Good morning class... my name is Herngy Werngy! I can solve the problem!"

He takes out a marker, pushes the teacher out of the classroom off the 100th floor, and writes on the board:

The way to write infinite, or numbers of unknown value :

The Algebra method.

1. Any letter, can represent any number for this method, to replace an unknown value ( like your girlfriend's phone number ). This letter magically takes on a new name called: VARIABLE
2. Any number can be placed in front of the variable to multiply the value of the variable in front of it by the number you squeezed in ( like how many hours you plan to recieve relaxing during weekends ). This number transforms into what you call: COEFFICIENT
3. Then... a flash of white light will blind you with it's brightness... as the variable and coefficient combine, evolving into a brand new and wild species of number, named: TERM (not term as in the term two, term three that sort of hybonix crap. Although I would love Term 4.)

This is only just the beginning...

Then he stops, and flies out of the window. A sickening crash follows with a blood fountain. The students shouted.... " PWNAGE!!!"

The following weeks... the pupils have come up with a brilliant new strategy to answer questions. They call it ASS (a simple solution).

1. If you don't know the answer, write down a letter of the alphabet to replace the unknown character.
2. If the question asks you for a statement, answer : 33224342 is the answer. Not me, HW did it.
3. If all solutions given above fail, just say this to your parents when you get the exam results : Don't worry dad/mom, a U grade is an example of algebra. Even me and the teachers don't know the answer. It represents something....uhhh...more than 1?

END OF LESSON-----------------------------------

PS: Summary of lesson in comments, coming soon!